TAKE 4 (5, 6, 7....), LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION!

Whatever "TAKE" I am on this week, we turn the lights on, point the camera, and begin shooting again until we get this film moving in the right direction.  Ironman Training is very much like a movie production.  Somebody researches the latest and greatest strategies for preparation, conditioning, training, nutrition, and equipment.  Then the writers put together the "SCRIPT" aka training plan.  The headline athlete is cast as the lead actor with her teammates as the supporting actors and other training partners stand in as EXTRAS whenever they are called upon.  There are many other important people that help create this master piece including designers for the set, lighting, costumes, and sound effects. You get the picture!   The director and producer are the key players who makes sure everything comes together and have to think quickly on their feet to maneuver around obstacles that pop up along the way.  The actual filming of the story requires a support crew with coaches, family, triathlon club, mechanics, doctors, therapists, and nutritionist that come to the set as needed.  The filming occurs in different locations.  It is not a linear journey as scenes are always being edited, cut, re-written, re-shot until the images start to come together to form a finished product to show off to the world.  The race will be the RED CARPET EVENT where athletes come in their most glamorous tri kit with their shiny bikes and escorted by their favorite sherpas.  Reaching the finish line is just the beginning of the AFTER PARTY.

It takes a village to build an Ironman.  I have heard that the second time around will never be as sweet as THE FIRST.  I threw my whole being into the experience: Train, Prepare, and Perform like being ROBO TRIATHLETE.  The side effects were amazing including a level of fitness that I had never achieved previously, a new group of friends that were like no others, endless fun and laughter (and maybe a few tears), self control and self discipline.  It is a thrill of a life time to set a lofty goal and see it through, but the feelings do not last forever and nor does the fitness.

This time around I decided I needed to be less self absorbed in the process and more self motivated and focused.  I will take what I have learned and surround myself with others and be the director, producer, and designer of the sequel.  My husband is training for a big bike ride which turns out to be the same weekend as my Ironman.  So we are trying to balance training, parenting, and family.  Our kids are only in our homes for so many years before they leave the nest and although our son is more independent, I don't want to miss out on the time that I have.

I am still receiving PT, but my therapist is a cyclist and encouraged me to begin moving again as part of the healing process.  So this week included: 2-30 min spins on the trainer and an hour ride out on the road, a 20 min and 45 min run and 90 min hike, and 2-30 min swims plus lots of neck and back exercises.  Tomorrow I go back for follow up post concussion testing and I am hoping on a green light to move forward on making this movie.

35 weeks remaining for movie production!  ROLL 'EM!

Paying Off Debts of Gratitude

Well today I spent the day paying it back, that is the debt I have accumulated over the past few years of people supporting my racing addiction.  Today you could say I consolidated my debt and tried to pay back the gratitude I have for as many people as I could fit in while juggling between 3 different events at the PF Changs Rock N Roll event in AZ.

I was cheering for my sister in law who returned to AZ to complete her first half marathon after being a spectator at many events for my family.  I was cheering for a few people in my neighborhood who were either logging another race or doing their first today.  I was cheering for many folks from my old and new Triathlon Groups.  The most special cheer today came for Team Wylder and meeting the people who have committed to Run for Rare Diseases and Honor a little friend of mine.  I met some new people. I saw some old friends.

I had to figure out how to fit everyone in during 5 hours of racing on 3 separate courses.  When I woke up this morning, I revised my plan so I could try and pay back a little love to everyone.  I went to the second mile on the Half and Mini Marathon Course.  First I met the father of a triathlete who just relocated to AZ with a new pro card.  I gave him some contacts for his son and watched his son fly by when the front of the pack came through.  Watching herds of runners and walkers pass by me for over an hour, I got to see the new fashion trends.  Neons are back in for shirts and compression socks.  And the tutu is popular for both men and women.  The homeless shelter is going to be warm tonight as by mile 2, many participants were shredding layers and throwing them on the side of the road.  Those items get donated to charity which is another good deed that comes out of a big event like this one.  Warm bodies of runners warm the hearts of strangers (Nice).  After I saw the last of the recipients of my payment, I headed for my car to maneuver to the finish line.  I was able to park across the street from the finish line but had to continue to follow the maze to get to my desired stake out spot.  I went to the 20K point where all 3 events were merging together less than a mile away from the finish line.  This way, I could try to see all my half marathon people and marathoners at the same time.  Finally I sped to the finish area and met up with the T-gen people who were running for Rare Diseases and Team Wylder.

There was a special tent city for all the organizations that had teams that participated to raise awareness and find cures for different medical diagnoses or to support participation of challenged athletes.  It donned on me that running has grown into a sport that is about so much more than the run.  People have used running to help fight disease, raise awareness for thousands of causes, and to promote inclusion and participation in sport by anyone that desires the opportunity.  It is not like professional sports where they can write a check to charity, but people pour their hearts and souls into something meaningful to them.  Some people are on the course for there own agenda like health, fitness, competition while others are there for support, comradery, or fighting a battle together by reaching out to the community.

Whatever the reason, I am proud to be a part of this community and though I often use endurance sport to better myself, I think it enriches the lives of some and unites many.  I was very happy to have the opportunity to tip my hat off to my peers, my neighbors, my team mates and to total strangers who were out there inspiring others.

The support from others to help one cross the finish line is not a debt that is easy to pay back, but it is certainly nice to try.  I am grateful for those that make this lifestyle possible and for those that are there for me when I am on the sidelines or crossing the finish.  I feel pride in watching others make things happen to achieve their goals since I know what is involved.

Congrats to all of those people who did something great today and for all the people that make it possible.

Panic Attack Yack Yack!

 
In the past, I have blogged on a weekly basis, but I am going to try and write more frequently.  Last night I was awoken by a feeling of constriction in my neck.  It seemed to get worse and I was trying to figure out what was happening (a typical physical therapist, always assessing the situation and signs and symptoms of my "state").  The past 3 weeks had been filled with anxiety over the motions which trigger dizziness every time I moved around in bed.  I had grown accustomed to these short spins around my bedroom as I had come to learn they would pass, but my body was always on alert and my brain was not getting adequate rest.  My therapist finally seemed to crack the code on Wednesday and we may have kicked Vertigo in the butt! (knock on wood). 48 hours spin free.  Life is Good!  Well, with that piece of the puzzle solved, all the neck and jaw pain seemed to return...it was just lurking underneath.  I was relieved it was finally time to address the Cervical Dysfunction portion of this so called Post Concussion Syndrome that has been haunting my body.

Despite having relief on the way in a few hours, I woke up in the middle of the night to discomfort in my neck jaw, neck and throat so I woke my husband up to warn him to be on watch as I shook and shivered.  I told him I was not certain what was happening, but let's wait it out.  I asked him to GOOGLE "Panic Attack" as I thought this might be what I was experiencing.  I did not want to seem naive as I knew these could be symptoms of something more serious, but if I did not pass out, stop breathing or die, I think we could go with Panick Attack. I apologized to him for all my bad behavior and talked about "the end" incase it was pending and within 10 minutes I was calm and joking, but my poor husband now had to bear the burden of worry and try to get back to sleep.

I finally fell asleep when my alarm went off to go to PT.  I was not sure why my doctor referred me to this specific therapist but I had checked to see if he was skilled in the techniques my doctor requested and then that morning I read more about him on their website for reassurance that I was going to the right place.  I was comforted to find an article on Whiplash and that the therapist was a cyclist.  But when I met him, I knew he was the person I had been waiting for to help me get BACK IN ACTION (and that is also the name of the clinic).  Did I mention that he was a cyclist!  I put my trust in him and when someone tells you with certainty that you are in the right place and they can help you, your faith is restored.  I only wish I would have started with him on this journey, but I am glad I landed in his clinic and I do believe he is going to get me back on track.  I don't expect a miracle, but I am more hopeful then I have been that this is all going to turn out in my favor.

So after a very thorough assessment, some major crunching of my cervical spine, and some mobilization and stretching techniques and some activities for home.  I left with renewed hope.  We agreed that I should try to build back up to 25% of where I was prior to the PCS and a slow return to work.  I also got a call from work that they found a therapist to come in and help with my caseload to remove some of the burden as my job is quite physical with lifting, bending and moving.

With a yellow light to proceed with caution, I met a friend for a walk and lunch and then my training buddy came over to work on some swim skills.  I don't think it was a GET OUT OF JAIL FOR FREE CARD, but maybe a One day pass.  I think there is going to be some work involved to be released from this prison for good, but I am so happy I have got to see daylight and so grateful not to see stars and planets rotating above my head.

Now the test will be to see how my night goes and what tomorrow brings.  It is great to get out of bed or lie on the floor without having to think about it and I look forward to hopping on my bike soon without worrying if I will be able to balance on 2 wheels again.  As a triathlete it is important to understand your body so you can get it to agree with your commands, but too much thought can provoke the opposite effect where the body overrides the mind's control.

RULE OF THREES: "1,2,3"

           
How do you know which are your 3 events?  When you strongly believe that bad things or good things happen in groups of 3!  For me, I am pretty sure I am on my third bout of interrupted energy.  First there was the 6 week long upper respiratory infection, then there was the car accident, and lastly there was the post concussion syndrome after the car accident.  I am sorry folks, although I am being told that my sensory processing is far below average and my memory is not what it should be for a person of my age and education level, I DO DECLARE I am on the tale end of my THIRD event and the frown must be turned upside down and the fight has to begin.

The third blow in this case was the worst, although the first 2 did not help my cause to establish a reasonable fitness base for training.  This third event with vertigo and cervical dysfunction has really robbed me of my sanity and my fitness.  The state of REST can only occur for so long.  As I type this, my husband is riding on MY rollers that I got for Christmas and I am sitting on the floor leaning against my bed.

I think I hit rock bottom yesterday, but when you hit the bottom there is only one way to go and you know how this stories goes.  So once again, I must peel myself off the ground and put on my work clothes and make my way out of this deep dark hole back to the light.  The good news is that I did get a boost from my PT yesterday when she helped me with a last chance Epley Maneuver to try and clear the little stones called otoliths in my head that are wreaking havoc with my nervous system.  She gave me some new exercises to try and I saw light.  I slept flatter on my back and my world did not spin last night.  The anticipation of things spinning also complicates matters, but if nothing else works, I am a believer that TIME heals most wounds and so our friend PATIENCE returns to the scene.

This morning I got out of bed.  That is a start.  Being imprisoned in one's home and bed is not the life for me.  My heart broke for every person and family that has to face these daily challenges and the loss of support around them (especially when I went to the rehab center where you see lives are changed forever and I was sitting on the other side of being a therapist).  This is my brush with the the power of our brain and disruption to central headquarters. When you are being pulled toward the negative energy side of your own battery, you begin to push people away. You know that people care about you and wish you well, but the truth of the matter is that people are not attracted to the negative energy when you are in your greatest moments of despair.  I am fairly certain my condition is temporary or transient but my emotional state declined while I was trapped in the whirly depths of my brain.  Today, my head is so much clearer.  Many people do not get the opportunity for return of independence and freedom.  I am so sad for anyone to experience that type of loss.  This could happen due to an injury or illness or an accident or just even the aging process.  This has been my brush with the other side of health.

All the more reason to experience what makes you feel whole, what gives you life, and that sets you free each day that you are able to.  One great triathlete told the world to "Embrace the Suck", but let me tell you "the Suck Sucks", so I am going to "Embrace the Race" and I think this season is going to have greater meaning for me.  I was out to prove that I could be fit and fabulous when I got to 50, but I think the journey this time around is going to be about so much more.  May the Tri Gods grant me the power to Tri Again and give me 256 more days to get to Chattanooga.

Since I am having trouble remembering anything after 3, this is as good of time as any to start counting over again!

New Parts on Back Order

This train is still waiting in the roundhouse for new parts.  It has been a tough week of silence.  I am in the middle of ongoing medical testing and beginning some treatments to address the vertigo and neck pain.

The first part of the week I was distracted by appointments and repeating the story of my accident and medical history over and over and as the week has gone on training withdrawal and depression are beginning to set in.

Tomorrow is the 22 week countdown to my Boulder 70.3 and 37 weeks to Chattanooga 140.6.

My symptoms are somewhat diminished with rest but are not gone completely.  I am still hopeful we reach a proper diagnosis and can resume pre season training to begin base training in 1 week.

My inspiration meter is on low, so not much more to write about on this evening, but here's hoping for a better more productive week so I don't have to check into the funny farm.  It appears the parts to get my engine back on track are on back order.  May someone expedite my order PLEASE!

DERAILED

Sorry this past weekends post was delayed as my life has been in a whirlwind so to speak.  So much for "Out with the Old and In with the New".  While on vacation in Seattle over the holidays, I developed vertigo.  Here is the definition for those of you who have not experienced it before.

noun: vertigo

1. a sensation of whirling and loss of balance, associated particularly with looking down from a great height, or caused by disease affecting the inner ear or the vestibular nerve; giddiness.

   synonyms:

   dizziness, giddiness, lightheadedness, loss of balance "the steep narrow stairs give me vertigo"

It was not the type of self imposed dizziness we all did as a child while spinning until we dropped in the grass and it was not the thriller type of a high speed ride at Disneyland or our first love that made us "giddy".  This is an annoying spinning sensation every time I lie down, roll over or stand up.  Once I am vertical, it clears up and I can go on with my day.  Coupled with head and neck pain lingering on from my car accident back in November, I went to seek medical advice this week.  I decided to go see a new doctor (who also happens to be the medical director for Ironman and a triathlete as I was looking for a sports minded doctor who could support my habit) and he felt that I had POST CONCUSSION SYNDROME which occurs after a traumatic event to head, face or neck and he sent me off for further testing and therapies.  Little did I know what was ahead for me.  My train is derailed and all the repair technicians have been summoned.  I have a plan in my future which includes rest, additional testing and fancy treatments like accupuncture, craniosacral therapy, and vestibular treatments.  This week I am to have minimal stimulation to allow my nervous system to heal (so no work or working out!).  The moral of the story is always allow your body and mind time to recover and heal from whatever events that have taken a toll.  Sometimes you cannot prevent obstacles ahead and your train will derail. None of us like to be waiting for repairs on the side track while most of our friends are out on the main line.

I do have to say that attending my Tri Club's Monthly meeting last night was the most therapeutic activity I have done all week.  Could it be that "my people" put a smile on my face and that is healing?  Could it be a room filled with positive energy is healing?  Could it be a reminder of patience and persistence and support will get me back on the track?  Triathlon is my church, my place of worship and solidarity.  I am thankful that it will be waiting for me when I am fixed.  As the little blue engine struggled up the hill, I THINK I CAN I THINK I CAN.

SIDE NOTE:  On this journey since my car accident, I have encountered people all over who share this common passion of endurance sport.  The police officer that handled my accident, 1 insurance agent who was a cyclist, another fellow IRONMAN AZ Alumni from Class of 2012 at the car repair shop (who just joined my tri club), and therapists who did a post concussion evaluation on me.  Everywhere I turn, they are there sharing the love making daily life better.  When your chips are down and you can talk the talk before you can walk the walk, another endurance athlete is there to pick you up.

Take care of your engines!  ALL ABOARD!!!!!!

Out With the Old and In With the New

Is there ever really an end in the world of triathlon.  Being of the analytical type, I will venture to say that the end of one year is as good a time as any to reflect on the past and plan for the future. We triathlete LOVE to plan!  We plan our workouts, our race seasons, our nutrition, our fashion, our goals, etc. etc. etc.   The annual training calendar may not exactly start in January, but it is as good as excuse as any for fresh starts and new beginnings.   Time for a cleanse to wash away the impurities and start from a fresh slate.

FLASHBACKS FROM 2013:
Desert Classic Duathlon
Leadman Triathlon
Tempe Triathlon (PR, Olympic distance)
Triple Summer 70.3 Series:  Deuceman, Vineman, Mountainman
Esprit de She Sprint San Diego
USAT Duathlon Nationals in Tucson
Hot Chocolate 15k
Fiesta Bowl Half Marathon

Liabilities:
New job this year with increased exposure to illness and injury
Auto accident
Weight gain
Loss of fitness and form

Support system:
Family
One Multisport Tri Club
Triathlon Community
Coaches
Equipment

FLASHFORWARD 2014:
Boulder 70.3
IRONMAN Chattanooga 140.3....CHOO CHOO!
Power
Flexibility
Form
Nutrition
Training  plan: using Joe Friel's training programs for guide and sport specific coaching in cycling, swimming, and nutrition

Life is like a pedal stroke, one stroke leads to another with no real beginning or end once you figure out how to make a circle until some interruption causes you to put the brakes on or forces you to slow down.  May you find your rhythm in 2014 and your year be filled with long slow steady miles of happiness and health along with all the exhilaration that builds up on your climbs and the thrill of a life's descents.  HAPPY NEW YEAR!