Chattanooga sucked the life out of me and I struggled with my health and energy after my second Ironman. I even wrote a poem about triathletes who compete in Ironman:
ONE AND DONE
TWO AND THROUGH
THREE ADDICTED.....
Who are You?
I am one of the lucky ones who's blood counts drop and immune system does not support the vigorous training and recovery is a bear. I thought for certain I was "2 and through", but I now had this 70.3 hanging over my head. I did not have the energy or the spirit to train properly. I was ready to end this battle and just hang Oceanside out to dry before it ever got wet. Something inside of me could not allow a paid race with no refund go by unused (LESSON #1: BUY THE INSURANCE!), so I accepted that I would just do it for fun with no set time goals and expectations except to cross the finish line and then I would finally be able to REST!
I built up a base and finally felt a few weeks before the race, "oh if I only had 12 more weeks, I could actually train for this race". I had to accept where I was and stick with the plan of not having a plan. Oceanside was a beautiful venue and we were blessed with perfect weather for race day. My tri club was there in full force so there were a lot of familiar faces around. What struck me most were that every person who I came into contact felt obliged to share their description of the bike course with me. There were many many different versions of this story! (the same 6% grade for one person was an 18% grade for another!) The logistics of the race required a lot of walking between the expo and the transition area, so what could have been a nice warm up, took quite a bit of energy and by the time we picked up our packet, checked out the expo and walked back to our hotel and then to the harbor to drop off our bikes in transition and back to the hotel, we were too tired to get a proper meal and we ordered pizza with chicken.
The next morning we had to wake early and walk 30 minutes back to transition. I did not feel good or bad and just went through the prep steps. The transition was huge and the only thing I would change is not having my own bike pump. That was nerve wracking waiting to borrow a pump to inflate my tires. The most important thing is inspecting your bike in transition and pumping your tires and until that was complete, I was a bit on the edge. Then we lined up for our swim waves. The weather was cooperating and the air temp was 55 with a water temp around 65 or so. That was a relief only having a sleeveless wetsuit, but I was good to go as long as the water was 60 or above. I made the mistake of taking my time to get into line and got stuck behind a few ladies at the swim start and could not break away from the slower swimmers until the first buoy. I even swam into a kayak at the start and because I don't see the purpose of using aggressive tactics to pull swimmers out of my way or swim on top of them I had to wait it out. (LESSON #2: Line up early and in the front of the swim!). Once I broke away, I did not have to deal with too much swimmer traffic. I headed out toward sea and then the chop begin. It was not too powerful but it felt like the waves were big and it was hard to make forward progress as our bodies turned into surf boards riding the waves. It made spotting the turning buoys a little tricky as well. Once you made the turn, Mr. Sun was right there to greet you and again I was not certain what line to follow so I mostly followed the people. I did not know if we had to swim along the buoy line before turning right into the final section or if we could just head to the finish. My time was over 4 minutes slower then my previous IM 70.3 races, but good enough. The transition was a long long run in the shoot and then a long long run back to the rack. I was slow but purposeful in getting my wetsuit off and bike gear on. My calves were already beginning to cramp as soon as I started pedaling but I was able to spin it off. Just as you begin, a steep hill is there to greet you and I stand as most people remain seated. There was a lot of excitement and I am just wondering where the first big climb (which is what I have been waiting to experience for 6 months) was and how I would feel at that point.
Once we rode through the first gate into Camp Pendleton, the roads were familiar to me as my husband and I had the opportunity to ride through part of the military base over the summer. I was doing ok and around mile 15 or so when we just started turning onto the bike path, my chain dropped and I managed to get it stuck behind the chain stop. Eventually after losing 8 minutes and a little help, I was back in action. My mind had already traveled to my day ending early. Eventually I got back into a rhythm. My legs were not feeling super strong, but I thought I was going fairly steady. They were already feeling some fatigue by mile 20. I was taking my nutrition, fluids, salt, but I could feel the legs starting to give. We finally entered the last gate into the base which is usually closed to the public and this is where the true ride began. I tried to use the momentum of the hills to get me through the ups and downs. So we get to the rolling part and a woman comes up behind me and says, "stay calm, don't be overwhelmed when you look ahead, just stick with it and you can do it". She was talking about the first big climb that my friends all so lovingly described after the rollers you will come to a section that looks straight up. "You will know when you get there". Yes, I had "arrived".
I already was ready to give it my best and if I had to walk, then I would. There were a few others who unclipped at the bottom of the hill, but I was going to stay clipped in and do what I could. I was able to conquer one section at a time and up, up, up I went. It was hard seeing others walking because that played tricks on your mind, but most of my time in training for this race on my bike was on hills. I did not do much interval training, but many many hours doing hills and drills. I did it. I got over the first hills, the second hill and the last. My legs were kind enough to get up the hills without too much rebelling but the cramps were going from after the big hill all the way to the finish line....I call them CRAMPS THAT KEEP GIVING. No amount of salt, fluid, anti-cramping tablets can save my day at this point. I just have to work through them. The last section of the ride had some nice down hill sections and then flattened out and YES, the headwind, as anticipated, accompanied us all the way to the finish. Thinking I escaped any major debilitating cramps, as I get off my bike after another very very long trip through the same transition chute. My legs went into major heavy duty spasm as I tried to put my running shoes on. If I bent my knee backward to reach my shoe from behind, my hamstring cramped and if I tried to squat to put my shoes on my quads locked up. I was perplexed as to how I would even get out of the transition area and thought I was headed to medical tent. A volunteer was walking by and I asked if he could tie my shoes and he did. As I started walking, I knew it would be a long day, but as my muscles relaxed, I thought I would try to run and I was able to get things started. That only lasted for about 2 miles. My legs were so heavy and tight and jumpy with spasms. I grabbed some vaseline which saved me from chafed arms as leg pain was enough to deal with and then the long WALK/JOG began. When I hit mile marker 1, I thought I would just about die if that is how painful and long it took to do 1 mile. Then I got to 2. The day was taking forever and I was questioning why I was putting myself through this over another silly race, another medal. I just wanted the day to be over and the hope of running was fading farther away.
There was a man who was walking and running and we kept meeting up and I said we need to get in sync and instead of quitting after 1 loop, he helped me get through the next hour. It turned out he was training for his first Ironman race in AZ and his cousin was a triathlete who I later learned belongs to my tri club. I decided I could get through this, but this was going to be my last race for a while.
Once again, I had my slowest race. It has all gone down hills since my first Ironman in 2012. I ended this race NOT with my best time, but with my best effort for that day and that has to be good enough. I knew for the condition I was in that the race would take 7 to 8 hours and I finished right in the middle.
Many of my friends are hooked, they are onto their next race. I guess I am not an adrenaline junkie after all. I celebrate the END! I have found peace in the fact that I am done. I experienced a big let down just like after my last full Ironman which included exhaustion, probably immune suppression again along with depression. All I wanted to do for a week was cry!
Today I had the best gift and that was finally getting back on my bike and riding just because I LOVE to and not to go a certain speed, watt or distance or to train for any big race. It is always a little disappointing to perform below your capabilities, but we don't always need to be at our peak. Loving the sport is more important to me then anything else and if that means taking some time off or staying away from competition, so be it. LOVE has peaks and valleys! LOVE has desire! LOVE means being kind to yourself and others! Separation may allow the heart to grow fonder. I LOVE TRIATHLON and I want to keep it that way.
I would love to go back to Oceanside some day when in a better mindset and better conditioning as it was a perfect course and we were fortunate to have ideal conditions for it. As Forest Gump says, "Life is Like a Box of Chocolates....You never know what you are going to get" holds very true for triathlon and race day!
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